If you’re looking for a guy to protect you, I’m not your guy. If you’re looking for sex, I’m not your guy. If you’re looking for a guy with the perfect body, I’m not your guy. I can’t help that you would have to tuck me in like a child every night or that I won’t to be able to get out of bed without you. So if you’re not interested based off what I just said I can’t do, don’t bother reading what I can do for you.
I was that guy for 24 years although that guy had a lot of things he couldn’t do for you either. Any guy you meet is going to have his deficiencies. For the most part, for 24 years, I lived for myself. I admit that I could be selfish. I was a pothead who was unpredictable and reckless. On the outside I looked good, but I definitely was not someone you wanted to settle down with. I had my own agenda and I wasn’t going to let anyone be a part of it. I was not the type of guy that was going to give you the love and affection that you deserve.
I literally had to die to learn how to live. So much was taken away, but so much was gained. The greatest lesson I learned is how to love. I realized that family is more important than anything. I never knew how blessed I was to have such a loving and supportive family.
With this new understanding of love my family grew closer together. I let my friends know how much I appreciate and love them. As I moved forward I became the type of person that would go out of my way to do anything for my friends. Unexpected relationships with new friends came who I never would’ve met if the accident never happened and I now had an understanding of what a true friend is.
Nearly every day I have someone reaching out to me for answers. Someone struggling that needs help that I’ve never even talked to in my life. I don’t expect anything in return from these people other than that they take my advice. People see how much adversity I have had to overcome and they just want to know how I always keep a smile on my face. I don’t have all the answers, but I feel that I am an expert on showing people everything they have to live for. The reward I get from helping these people is seeing their transformation over time and getting them excited to get out of bed in the morning.
So I’ve talked about what I can’t give you. Now let’s talk about what I can give you. I know how to love and to love deeply. If you were with me I would constantly remind you how beautiful life is and how beautiful you are and how much we have to live for together. You wouldn’t hear any complaints. I would help you live a life without fear. To live a life filled with optimism and appreciation for every second that we are together. You would have stability. I would always greet you with a smile and excitement. I would be the best father you could ever ask for. I would find so much joy watching our children grow and learn even the tiniest things in life. I get so much satisfaction from putting a smile on a random strangers face so just know how hard I would try to always give you something to smile about and making you happy is all the gratification I need.
I’ve never really been in a serious relationship because whoever it is that is out there I have not met yet. I’ve fallen head over heels in love with some girls just to find that they only have some of what I’m looking for, but I’m yet to find that whole piece to the puzzle. I know that you’re out there. The girl that will overlook my deficiencies and love me for all that I have to offer.
I know that one day I’ll be with someone that can make hours feel like seconds when we’re together. I can’t wait to laugh with you. I can’t wait to hold your hand and kiss you for the first time. I can’t wait to make you smile for the first time and fall in love with that image, but be able to see it again and again. I just can’t wait to meet you and grow with you so that we can make each other whole. Because I know you are what’s missing in my life. I’ll know it is true love because there is nothing I know better than love.