A dream is what drives me. Without dreams we would have nothing to live for. I do not want to be mediocre. I want to be remembered for doing something great. I want to leave a legacy behind. So long after I’m gone there are still things to remember me by. I want to affect lives for many years to come even after I’m gone.
A year ago I was lost. I thought that everything I worked for was now over. But that was when I started writing. I realized I had so much to share with this world. There was so much that I could no longer do but I realized that I still had my mind. I had overcome so much in such a short period of time. But the worst part about it is that I was not happy. I was lost. Everyone just wanted to see a smile on my face. But how could I smile when I felt like I just lost everything?
I went to see a psychiatrist on a weekly basis because my family was so worried about me. I actually went to check into the psych ward but when I got there they were not able to take care of me so I went home. That was when I realized that it had gone too far and had dragged on too long. There was no reason to keep living like this. To drown myself in self-pity. I felt suicidal and I even talked about it. My parents had to hide my pills from me because they were worried that I would kill myself. I even thought about driving my wheelchair off a dock and into a lake and ending it right there. But thank God I had the support of my friends and family and they promised me that I had a bright future ahead of myself.
When I started writing I decided to write only the truth. I wanted people to know exactly how I was feeling. I wanted to reach people in a way so that they would never feel like I was feeling. When I posted that first note on my Facebook about my crash the response was overwhelming. I received an overwhelming number of messages. People were telling me that they were starting to realize how small their problems were comparatively. That I had changed their perspective on life. So I started to write every day and I waited for the messages and the comments to pour in. I was finally starting to see a purpose in my life.
My writings started off a little depressing. People told me that they were crying when they read my messages and many people messaged me and told me that they were praying for me. They were praying that I make a full recovery. But I’m sure some were just praying that I become happy once again and turn back into the person that I was before my accident. Those were the prayers that came true. Because today I am the Adam that you all know and love. I can smile and laugh and sometimes make fun of my situation.
I had so many dreams before my accident. Dreams of building lakes and driving fast cars. Dreams of buying my first boat and my own home on the water. Dreams of moving to California and longboarding near the ocean. Even then I was in the process of writing a book. But it’s nothing like the book that I am publishing now. I wanted to call it ‘The Marijuana Poster Child’ because I had accomplished so much while smoking all through school. Thank God that book was never published. That was a horrible idea and I do not think I am the poster child considering what happened to me because of using the drug. Marijuana kind of ruined me and I wish I could’ve seen how much more I would’ve accomplished if I never started using.
My mind is clearer now than it ever has been in my entire life. I can thank my accident for that. I am closer to my family than I ever was. I feel that people now know the real me and know exactly what I am made of. I never thought I could overcome so much adversity. I also never thought that something so horrible happening to me could turn into something so great.
Lately I have been meeting with public speakers and grant writers to talk to them about my interests for the future. They believe in me and see if great future ahead of me. I believe that I will touch more lives than I ever could have before my accident. I am a better person because of it. I see the world much differently than anyone else. There is so much opportunity out there. Never give up on your dreams. I’m doing all of this with just one hand. And with just one hand I think I’m doing it better than I ever would have done before.